Sometimes we read or hear scary stories that we simply can’t get out of our minds. And unfortunately, these types of stories have the ability to shape our fears, and even the way we go about life. Maybe your fears are stopping you from quitting your job. Maybe you won’t step foot on an airplane. Or maybe you have sworn off the idea of ever meeting someone online. The good news is that fear itself is normal. We all have fears, whether irrational or not. And the even better news? There are concrete and actionable dating safety steps that you can follow to smash your fears and enable you to date with confidence.
1. Do not list your last name or employer in your dating profile.
This information alone is enough for anyone to go off of, allowing you to be deeply researched. Don’t allow people the opportunity to research you before you have even gone out on one date.
2. Meet in a public place.
Always meet in a public place for date #1. Do not go for a country road walk. Do not meet at one of your homes. Don’t go hiking or fishing or boating. Make sure you can see at least 5 other people at all times.
3. Trust your intuition.
There is something really crazy about intuition. It’s unexplainable, yet has the potential to save your life. Listen to it! If it’s telling you to get yourself out of a certain situation, get yourself out of that situation. If you need inspiration, just think of Mrs. Straub, who about to board a ship that would later sink, ran away screaming before even boarding… because of her intuition.
4. Don’t act nervous.
Don’t ever act nervous. There is something about a scared person that makes them more of a target. Don’t let that be you. Fake confidence and calmness, even if you don’t feel it on the inside.
5. Watch your drink like a hawk.
Do not ever leave your drink unattended. If you must go to the bathroom, make sure to finish your drink first. You can order a new one when you get back. Alternatively, your bathroom break can act as a nice transition phase for saying goodbye (if you don’t want to continue the date from there).
6. Make sure someone always knows where you are.
Before meeting up with someone new, let a friend, roommate, or family member know where you are going to be that night. This just adds an extra layer of security to everything.
7. Never share your financial info.
No matter how convincing of an argument the person comes up with, do not share any financial information whatsoever. This should go without saying, but here it is in writing – just in case.
8. Make it clear that you don’t have all night.
Before meeting up for a first date, make it clear that you don’t have a lot of time because of [insert reason here]. That way, if you are ever feeling uncomfortable, it’s going to be much easier to leave. However, if you are enjoying the date and want to stay longer, you can always say that you’ve decided to cancel your plans. Or, you can fake getting a text saying that the plans have been cancelled.
9. Do not bring them home on date #1.
And do not go to their place either. This might be extremely tricky for some, but nothing is worth the risk you take by breaking this rule. By following this rule, you will weed out most of the people will ill-intentions.
10. Don’t get in a car together.
Make sure to arrange a way to get yourself home – whether by public transportation, a friend, or your own ride. Just don’t get into a car alone with your date.
11. Meet during the day.
This is obviously not a rule that should always followed. However if your intuition is on the fence, opt for the day date. And if your potential date doesn’t agree to this, you will know that you’ve made the right choice.
12. Pay attention to their profile.
Although it’s normal for Tinder profiles to be void of information, this is less okay on sites like OkCupid or Match.com. If you are meeting someone from an actual full-on dating site, make sure there is at least a bit of information to go off of in the profile text. A blank profile is a bit of a red flag. Same thing goes for photos. Fewer than 3 is generally a warning sign.
13. Choose your own photos wisely.
If you choose to use a lot of drunken party pictures on your dating profile, it could just make you an easy target. With the wrong person, this could send the message that you’re easily manipulated through the use of alcohol. If you are in need of help when it comes to selecting the most beneficial photos for your profile, feel free to check out my services and send over a message!
14. Use the resources at hand.
If you find yourself in a tricky situation in which you feel unable to leave a place, make use of an employee. Always have a mini notepad and pen on hand. This way, you will always have the option of slipping a note to someone to ask them for assistance.
15. Download a dating safety app.
There are a few interesting dating safety apps out there (like bSafe) that are made to ensure your well-being. Check them out and see if one looks good to you!
I hope this post helped you to feel a bit more confident when it comes to dating safety. It is unlikely that you or anyone you know will be involved with anything too dramatic when going on dates. However, it is still an extremely important set of knowledge to have on hand. Please do share this with your single friends, and refresh yourself on these rules every now and then. And if you want to be extra cautious with the whole process, you can always run a quick background check (in the rare case that you already know your date’s first and last name).
Are there any dating safety tips you’d like to share?
Please do so in the comments below! Or if you have a online dating success story, feel free to share that as well. I always love hearing about the abundance of good that comes from online dating.
Until next time!